The Paths We Take

It's hard to believe that it was exactly a year ago that my life took an unexpected and drastic twist. I was happily working at my first big-kid job in Dallas when I was suddenly laid off. WHAT?? I mean, seriously - my first job. 2012 was a year - let me tell you. And this was the cherry on top of an incredibly heinous year.

I remember going home that night and just thinking, "What in the world do I do now?" I had no clue where to start. I was so confused. I couldn't stop crying. I had a few, "Why me?" moments. And so Heavenly Father and I had MANY conversations about why it was happening to me.

And I was mostly really sad. I felt ashamed. I didn't want anyone to know. I felt like a failure. I couldn't even keep my first job. What did that mean I was meant to do? Was I not as capable as I thought I was? I felt like I was a huge disappointment - to my parents, my professors, my former co-workers. Etc., etc., etc. There was a lot of self-doubt going on.

But looking back I see how blessed my life has been because Heavenly Father redirected my path. I'm a planner and I usually don't do well with subtle promptings to make changes in my life, so Heavenly Father has to go to the extremes with me. I LOVED my job, but because of that, I was leaving hardly any time for anything else. Yes, I was happy. But I could have been even happier. I didn't fully understand what I was missing out on.

So even in the 6 months of job-searching (which was grueling and awful and I'm so glad it's over), I was SO happy. Because I had been forced to re-prioritize my life. I was doing the things I should have been doing all along and it was making all the difference in the world.

I had the opportunity to meet people and develop relationships and learn things about myself that I never would have if Heavenly Father had allowed me to continue down the path I was on. So while it was hard and depressing and wearing at times, I'm so grateful that I got knocked down a little bit. That I was humbled so that I learned to rely on my Heavenly Father again. That I was given the opportunity to become teachable. And trust me - I took the opportunity to learn all the lessons in store for me.

Nobody really WANTS trials and tribulations in their life, but they are necessary for our growth and development. God loves us so he allows things to happen in our lives for us to become better versions of ourselves. I couldn't be more grateful for the gospel in my life that allows me to have that perspective and for church leaders, parents, friends, etc. that help me through the trials in my life.

2012 sucked. 2013 has been awesome. And I cannot wait to see what 2014 has in store.